Never Postpone Happiness

If there’s one thing I’ve learnt the past year, never short change yourself. You are entitled to so much joy in life. Every moment lived in fear are precious moments not lived in joy. Every moment not lived in joy and you’ve short changed yourself on life.

The past 3 weeks were amazing. On a sunny Sunday, I walked into a bustling bakery down the road with a friend and grabbed a wholemeal loaf. As i approached the cashier, spontaneously, a question popped out, “Do you have any jobs available?” Next thing I knew, 2 days after, I’m running around packing, collecting, labeling, and cashiering in one of the fastest moving bakeries in town. I have at least a dozen cuts on my hands. My back is aching. My legs feel like mush (getting used to staying on my feet and running around for 9 to 10 hours a day). Was paid a peanut and a dime, and had 20 minute lunches in a tiny storeroom corner sitting on cardboard boxes of supplies, but gosh was it fun. I felt alive! Should have done this long ago.

I fell sick last week (cough, fever, flu. sore throat – the whole cocktail) and my shoulders and back (and bones??) ached even further – had no time to recover. I still went to work. Didn’t want to miss even a day cause it was such fun.

My aches will recover. My flu and cough will go away. My cuts will disappear. And I will have memories of working with these amazing people serving what I love – good food to good people. Such joy.

Sad that it had to end yesterday. I have to look for a job that pays much better and has less strenuous hours. I knew i love food and the food service industry, but i didn’t know it could make me come so alive.

My colleagues were such hardworking and fun people. Very skilled and underpaid, but they are simple folk who didn’t look beyond to demand for more. They asked me why i had to leave. I told them i needed a higher pay. They asked me point blank and honestly how much i needed. I smiled and said, “6 times more.” And they went, “hahhh!!! really ah??” … errr, yarlor.

I wish i could have stayed, but i need to move on. JB? Europe? I know one thing for sure though – it has to be the food service industry. A bakery? A café?

I’ve never felt so free and happy. I’ve never had my bank account going backwards either, so I do know I need to get my life in gear. At least now I know, I’m gearing in the right direction – joy.

In the past 7 working years, I’ve met so many colleagues who felt trapped in their jobs. They want to move on – some to the point of depression – but they’ve imposed on themselves over the years with commitments and fears. Even as I was working in the bakery, a sweet malay (baker) girl came up to me to ask…

“Kak, kak pergi Johor yea?”

“Yea”

“Kat mana? Bila??”

“Minggu depan. Kat Taman Pelangi, JB.”

Her face fell.

“Seronoknyaaaa….I dari JB. I mau balik Kak.”

“Kenapa tak balik? JB takda kerja ke?”

“Ada. Tapi belajar kat sini.” (At the bakery from the Pastry Chef’s)

”Sampai bila?”

“Tahun depan. Bulan enam.”

“Tak lama lagi lah.”

“LAMA kak. Tak boleh tunggu. I mau balik.”

She looked so sad my heart ached.

“Kalau hati tak boleh tunggu, ambil cuti – seminggu ke, dua minggu ke – balik JB cari kerja. Kalau hati tak senang, kepala pun sakit.”

“Yea, yea, kak! Memang!! Tak henti henti pikir keluarga kat JB. Kat JB I gembira kak…”

English Translation:

“Big sis (sign of respect), are you headed to Johor?”

“Yes”

“Where? When??”

“Next week. At Taman Pelangi, JB.”

Her face fell.

“Wowww….I’m from JB. I want to go back Big Sis.”

“Why don’t you? Doesn’t JB have jobs for you?”

“There are. But i’m learning here.” (At the bakery from the Pastry Chef’s)

”For how long?”

“Till next year. 6th month (June).”

“That’s not too long.”

“It IS Big Sis. I can’t wait. I want to go home.”

She looked so sad my heart ached.

“If your heart can’t wait, take a vacation – a week, two weeks – return to JB and look for work. If your heart is unsettled, your head will start hurting too.”

“Yes it’s true!! I can’t stop thinking about my family in JB. In JB, i’m happy …..”